Does the world really need to know that? That's the phrase I want running through your head before posting ANYTHING on Facebook... Does the world really need to know that?
I'm connected with plenty of good friends, relatives and random acquaintances, and while they may very well be good people, they are stampeding Facebook with nonsense. I can't be the only one that feels people's opinions on Facebook are too personal and pointless today. Their comments and status updates produce no comedy or intuition.
Between 2005 and 2009, Facebook was perfect. You would log in on Monday and Tuesday to view pictures of the weekend's events. One night Rik was triple-fisting, the other night Adam would be getting jiggy to some jam, and maybe I'd be standing in some obscure position with a silly face (no homo).
Those were the days Facebook was pure, without too much thought. But today? It's like a Chris Farley movie with a Charles Dickens' script. Facebook's concept used to be simple and perfect. No one complained about it. No one wanted it to change, but now they've complicated matters - and as I see it, the biggest problem is the overhaul of opinions. Yes, opinions matter, but not so many and not so often.
Here are variations of my Facebook "friends" recent status updates and what I thought of them:
- PATS BABY!!! 7-0!!!! KEEP IT UP!!!! (The mid-game sports post)
Yes, the Patriots just scored a touchdown, but I don't need a reminder because I'm watching the game. Had I been away from the TV and unable to watch, I would have turned on the radio or checked ESPN.com - I would never rely on your Facebook statuses. Furthermore, anyone who's checking your status right now probably isn't a Pats fan and doesn't care about football, so basically you're talking to yourself. Please delete this comment, as well as the following 57 updates you're going to post throughout the game. - What's the difference between the papacy and NCAA coaches?... They both touch little boys. (The offensive, in-vogue news post)
Okay. First of all, that's not a difference, that's a similarity. And even though I think that's hilarious.... actually, check that, I like this post. Well done. - LMFOA @ MITT ROMNEY and NEWT GINGRICH!!! GET BENT!!!! (The politically driven post from an idiot)
I understand you are a die hard Obama supporter and you probably think all Republicans are pitiful and selfish, but what did mother say about bringing politics to the dinner table? Secondly, I'm tired of people player-hating politicians. It doesn't matter if they're Republican or Democrat, they're all Americans trying to make life better and/or worse for everyone. People in blue states have this dumb notion that Republicans are out to screw the middle and lower class. And red-staters think liberals are gonna turn this country into a socialistic, foreign speaking, immigrant haven... Well guess what, it already is, so deal with it. I loved George Bush for his humorous press conferences and media moments, and I love Obama for his confidence and charisma. Whoever is president, it doesn't fucking matter because nothing ever changes in Washington other than the fart-snot that gets subbed from the oval office every four to eight years. - Don't wait until tomorrow, live it up today (The good vibe, life tip post)
Does the world really need to know that? When did you become Buddha and I your apprentice? Maybe you should take your own advice, spend less time on Facebook and actually LIVE IT UP. Nobody my age can tell me how to live, nor has a better handling of their life than I do. I may wear things on my sleeve more than most, but there's no way I need life lessons from some 20-something-year-old who's still working a part-time internship. Yea, buddy, YOU LIVE IT UP with your zero-to-minimum wage and let me figure out my own life. Asshole.
Now let's all take a deep breath and not post a Facebook status for the rest of the day. If there's breaking news, let the news stations handle it. I don't need fucking news reports on Facebook. The site is there to share pictures, funny videos and links to things that have purpose. If I were emperor of Facebook, I would limit everyone's posts to three per day.
Free your mind, let go of your computer and withhold your fingers from interpreting thoughts onto Facebook. Relax and trust me, the world doesn't need to know what you're about to say.
